Nonmonogamy and Neurodiversity: A More Than Two Essentials Guide

Too often, the neurodivergent community is marginalized, de-sexualized or patronized. Neurodivergent people are often not seen as part of the romantic or sexual landscape at all, let alone as people who can have multiple partners. However, the fact that neurodivergent people do not see the world or operate within it as other people do makes nonmonogamy both uniquely challenging and uniquely well-suited to them. Many varieties of neurodivergence mesh with the requirements of this life more easily than the neurotypical baseline does and cultivating those traits can make a polyamorous life far easier. But there are also situations that come with neurodivergence that can make being polyamorous more difficult.

Nonmonogamy and Neurodiversity is for neurodivergent people considering or practicing nonmonogamy. Its goal is to help neurodivergent people understand how well-suited they are to the polyamorous life, and to help them recognize and manage the challenges that being neurodivergent can bring to nonmonogamy. It is also for the partners and potential partners of neurodivergent people, to encourage them to understand different perspectives and to help them be understanding, accommodating and well-informed. Nomonogamous relationships do not belong exclusively to the neurotypicals, but to us all.

More Than Two Essentials is a series of books by Canadian authors on focused topics in nonmonogamy. It is curated by Eve Rickert, author of the books More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory and the forthcoming Nonmonogamy and Jealousy. Learn more and find all forthcoming titles at morethantwo.ca.

Alyssa Gonzalez is a biology Ph.D., public speaker and writer. She writes extensively about biology, history, sociology and her experiences as an autistic ex-Catholic Hispanic transgender immigrant to Canada at her blog, The Perfumed Void. She also writes speculative fiction that explores social isolation, autism, gender, trauma and the relationships among all of these things. She lives in Ottawa, Canada with a menagerie of pets.